Patients ask strange questions

In general the patients I see in private practice are a bit more educated than patients in the government hospitals, but not always. I was doing a locum at a practice when a man came in to do an HIV test. I bombarded him with pre-counseling: explaining what HIV is, how you get it and what treatment is available if he does test positive. A rapid finger prick test was done. I counseled him again after the test and asked if he had any questions.

He seemed quite grateful for the opportunity and asked his question, slightly embarrassed: “Cen you test my gey?”. I asked him to repeat himself because I had obsiously heard wrong. “Cen you test my blood for gey?” I asked him to spell it for me. “G-E-Y. Gey.” He said.

Oh, gay?

He wanted me to do a blood test to check if he is gay. I did not ask too many further questions and politely explained we don’t do blood tests for that.