How to: Not Eat That Cookie🍪 (If you have a better answer, please tell me how)

We all do it. (Or, DON’T do it)

We know what we should eat and we know that we should exercise… but we don’t. Why is that?

There are many different theories, which are psychological, philosophical, and biological… but to put it plainly, as humans, that’s our default mode: we crave immediate comfort and tend to choose the path of least resistance.

Sometimes, even when we know what we should do, emotions like stress, boredom, or tiredness can take over and make quick comfort feel more important than long-term goals.

If meals aren’t planned properly, hunger can hit hard and weaken decision-making, this makes it much easier to grab whatever is nearby instead of sticking to good intentions.

Often it’s not a lack of knowledge, but a mix of emotions, environment, and being unprepared that trips us up… so then a good plan might be to work on emotional regulation, food prep, and controlling your environment.

O, and remember, processed foods contain ingredients that your body and mind crave, which make willpower and dopamine levels (in the long run) decrease.

It’s not a straightforward reason, so the solution is, therefore, not straightforward either.  Unless you ask your overachieving husband, who might say something like: “just don’t eat the cookie” or “just go workout in the gym.” Seems like it might just be easier for some people?

I think it’s also different for something you need to get yourself to do (like exercise), compared to not doing something (like eating the cookie that is there.)

My advice to myself and anyone else who suffers from akrasia:

1. Be compassionate with yourself. Don’t “should” yourself. Treat and talk to yourself like someone you care for. (Thanks, JBP!) Your harsh sergeant major inner voice might have worked when you were a child, but try speaking to your 39 year-old self like that… she ain’t gonna listen no more.
2. Have a plan.  Get to know yourself.  Know what a truly healthy lifestyle is for you.  Then, aim to do it 85% of the time. Give yourself some slack. Otherwise, your inner rebel might jeopardize your plans. (My inner rebel wants to do exactly what I tell it not to do!) You could even have an “emergency plan.” For example, when I want to eat the cookie, I will first drink a glass of water and wait 10 mins. Also, planning meals for the week will help… I want to start meal prepping.
3. Small steps at a time and every little bit counts.  Maybe you didn’t go to gym, but 10 squats are still better than nothing.  Do 5 squats while the kettle boils (or in the shower.) Do stretches while watching a TV show.  Add some veggies with your meal. Every little bit counts.
4. Modify your environment and leave yourself “breadcrumbs.” No, not real breadcrumbs (unless it’s sourdough bread), but make it easier for yourself to achieve your health goals. Have healthy snacks around, stick motivational words on the fridge. Play uplifting music.  Arrange with friends to go walking.  Specifically, tell your guests to bring healthy food to a function. Put your work-out clothes ready where you can see them.  That way, you rely less on willpower, which, if you’re anything like me, might sometimes be lacking.
5. Know your bigger WHY and remind yourself of it. Maybe have a note on your phone or a physical note for yourself somewhere of why you want to follow a healthy lifestyle.  Maybe it’s because you want energy to have fun with your kids or because you don’t want to feel dead tired every day.
6. Practice emotional regulation.  Learn to recognize your emotions.  What emotions trigger you to eat? Then, learn to sit with an uncomfortable feeling, don’t try to immediately change it.  Allow the feeling to be without doing anything, just feel it.  Having a formal meditation practice can help.  But the goal is to recognize thoughts and feelings so that you are not swept away by them.

What else helps you to stick to your healthy lifestyle? Let me know, I can adjust this list and advice until we have a good, practical plan… these are general guidelines, everyone should perhaps have their own written “Healthy Lifestyle Management Plan” 🤣 or is that taking it too far?